Monday, July 25, 2011

What scares me the most

Do you know what it means to miss New Orleans?  I do.  It's crazy.  I have such a love/hate relationship with my hometown.  See, I was talking to another Brain Balance mom who can't wait to get back home and can't believe that I'm staying through another school year.  Truth be told, I'm scared of going home.  Life as it used to be will be no more.  Spencer and I have successfully removed television (with rare exceptions) from our life.  We eat a VERY restricted diet.  I don't have to travel any further than the closest grocery store to get what we need.  There are many activities around directed toward children with special needs.  I absolutely adore his teachers at school.
But New Orleans conjures up the image of the debauchery of Mardi Gras for many out of towners.  It is such a shame.  New Orleans is a city unlike any other.  You may think all New Orleanians think about is alcohol- you'd be wrong.  We are obsessed with food.  And rightfully so, we have some of the best food in the world.  Due to Spencer's dietary restrictions, I cook A LOT.  At home, I would often get a break from cooking and my husband would take over.  Now, my husband is not much of a chef.  He can make two things: 1- reservations & 2- take out orders. There will be no breaks for me, as there is no restaurant to my knowledge that even comes close to preparing food that Spence can have.  And I refuse to eat something in front of the child that he can not have.  And then it saddens me that Spence will never get to experience a big portion of the culture of New Orleans.  He will never enjoy gumbo (can't make a roux without flour), étouffée, my mother's (from my grandmother's recipe) dressing, etc.  So, it is safer to stay here.  I don't eat out, so I don't know what I am missing with any of the restaurants.
I dread the holidays.  Which, of course, center around food.  There will no more holiday baking, candy making, or cake decorating.  And I'll bet everyone will be running for the vegan chocolate chip cookies.  (They are quite good- just not like the 'real' thing.)
Another bee in my bonnet would be the lack of community support.  If there is a network in place for kids like mine, I haven't made the right contacts to find it.  Disheartening.  I go to the Kroger here and can talk to anyone in the natural foods section.  Most have autistic children.  They give me tips on where to get coupons for the stuff Spencer eats and are concerned with getting in any new items you wish. I can bring Spence to a sensory playground in Atlanta or take him for a golf cart ride when he gets too antsy.  What am I going to do when I am home?  I'm pretty sure I'd have to cross the Mississippi River to get and do ANYTHING.  It is such a shame that with as widespread an epidemic that autism is, there are areas (like New Orleans) that offer little to no resources for our kids.  So, I'll start my Google quest and my Facebook pleas.
Oh my gosh, I forgot to mention football!  A Martin family tradition is to watch football.  NFL game day preparations include the 8 foot inflatable Saints player in the yard and the family bedecked in jerseys or Saints t-shirts.  We'll eat our meals on Saints plates with Saints napkins and the table will have a Saints tablecloth.  But we are not alone.  The Saints are a HUGE part of the city.  You'll see Saints paraphenallia all over on game day. It was weird moving here (Atlanta).  In fact, the day I moved was the Saints-Falcons Monday night football game.  We were all decked out in our Saints stuff and I didn't see a single Falcon t-shirt or jersey.  In fact, in New Orleans, I doubt I've ever seen a car sticker or a t-shirt or a hat for any other NFL team but the Saints.  It's who we are.  My stepson's playroom is going to be black and gold, so he can hang his Saints posters; the adjoining bathroom already has a Saints motif.  Crazy.  To some, yeah.  To us, no.  We watch college football (Geaux LSU!!) and pro.  Usually, you'll find the whole family outside during halftime throwing the football.  (Yes, including me.) Spence is usually running around.  However, that much TV is not good.  I'm laughing because this is reminding me of a breakfast conversation I once had with Peyton about how the Saints were going to defend against the wildcat.  (By the way, he was asking for my opinion) Yeah, we take our football that seriously.
So, I guess I'll do what I always do.  Breathe, plan, implement.  I have these two rings that I wear on my right hand.  They are silver and on one is inscribed, "Nothing is impossible" on the other "Be the change you wish to see in the world"
Now is as good a time as any- watch out New Orleans.  Change is a good thing and will only enhance your already unique character.  The planning has already begun.....

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